Tom Moore · DiggyDog · Homer Spurlock & Doc Shotgun

April 2009 · the first episode, in full

The Jackrabbit Courier

By Tom Moore, writing as DiggyDog

"Homer?"

"What, Doc?"

"What's that?"

"What’s what, Doc?"

"That, over there!"

"Oh. That! That’s a jackrabbit, Doc."

"I know it's a jackrabbit, but what is that around its neck, Homer?"

"It appears to be a note Doc, I think Ranger Headquarters has an assignment for us."

"Doc, you need to catch that jackrabbit and get the note, it must be of vital importance, and they haven't used animal couriers since the old Republic days."

"Homer, I can't catch no jackrabbit, and you can't neither."

"Yes I can, Doc. Pay attention."

(Homer puts his fingers in his mouth, whistles very loud, and the jackrabbit stands on its hind legs. Homer then removes his stetson, hurls it like a frisbee, it lands over the rabbits head, blocking his vision, and causing him to be calm and still. Homer removes the note from the jackrabbits neck, then his stetson. The jackrabbit runs away.)

"Wow Homer! that was great!"

"Primary, Doc, primary."

"Well, what does the note say, Homer?"

"It doesn't say anything, Doc. It's just a note, it can't talk."

"Thanks for clearing that up, Homer."

"My pleasure Doc."

"So, Homer, how can I find out what is in the note?"

"Kindergarten, Doc, kindergarten. I shall read the note aloud, and you can listen. It will be the words in the note, but it will be my voice you will hear, because it's a note and a note can't talk."

"Homer, you are so brilliant!"

"I know, Doc, I know."

"Ranger Headquarters wants you and Doc to check out the Wild Man of Blooming Grove, solve the mystery of his identity, and report back through me, using animal couriers. This mission is of vital importance. E"

"E, Homer?"

"Yes Doc, it is from E"

"Wow, Homer, this is really big!"

"Yes, Doc. I read about the Wild Man in the community newsletter. It seems one day, he just appeared from nowhere. He was found locked in a cage in the park, near the playground, No one knows who he is or how he got there. I think there is a devious connection here, this sounds like the work of my old nemesis."

"Your old nemesis, Homer? You don't mean...."

"Yes Doc, I'm afraid I do, This sounds like the work of Mortyfarty!"

"Mortyfarty! We better get over to Blooming Grove quick, Homer!"

"Yes, Doc. Time is of the essence. Saddle the horses, Doc, the game is afoot!"

"Afoot, Homer? How long?"

"12 inches, Doc."

"Homer, you know everything!"

"Of course, Doc, of course."

Stay tuned for the further adventures of Homer Spurlock and Doc Shotgun, as Homer brings into play his awesome powers of nonductive reasoning in a Herculean effort to solve the baffling case of:

The Wild Man of Blooming Grove